The Hundred Word Tales
by SpaceCaseWriter
Summary: This is a collection of one-hundred-word Mario oneshots... easy for my short attention span to handle. xD Enjoy!
1. The Kidnapping?

**Author's Note:** Yep, I thought I'd try a collection of super-short one-shots. I've seen some writers confining their one-shots to one hundred words, so I figured I'd give it a shot-it's perfect for my short attention span. xD All of these one-shots will have to do with the Mario games, and quite a few will probably have characters from the Paper Mario series... I have no idea how many of these mini-oneshots I'll end up posting; I think I'll just keep adding to this collection sporadically.

**Disclaimer: **All Mario characters belong to Nintendo, not me. This disclaimer will apply to every chapter in this fic.

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Bowser stared, jaws agape, at the pink, yellow, and white splattered across his shell front. He raised his eyes to meet those of the princess who glowered several paces away, frosting all over her hand. The entire room of guests watched with bated breath—except for Mario, who gave Princess Peach an appraising glance before stepping forward, hammer in hand.

"Not-a today," said the plumber sternly. Just behind him, Princess Peach reached for her parasol.

_I'll _never _try to kidnap Peach on her birthday again, _vowed Bowser silently, gulping and stepping back towards the door.

…_I'll get her tomorrow instead._

_

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**Author's Note (again): **...Yeah, I couldn't help but think how exasperating the repeated kidnappings must be, so I wrote... this. As always, reviews are appreciated! :D


	2. The Treasure Is Revealed!

"I can't believe we're finally opening this thing!" squealed Goombella as Professor Frankly started prying open the chest.

"This is a momentous occasion," agreed Frankly. And, with one last heave, he lifted the lid.

Upon hearing the exited babble spewing out of the elderly Goomba's mouth, the U-Goom graduate eagerly peered into the chest…

"… That's just… totally…" She couldn't believe it—the legendary treasure, sought by so many, was just…

"I know, this is incredible! Fascinating! A Dried Shroom… We now know that these people ate mushrooms, like us!"

"…Mario's gonna get a kick outta this," Goombella remarked dryly.


	3. Moment to Himself

Mario stared proudly at his creation: the mound of angel hair, topped with a hearty portion of green herbs, waiting on his plate. Finally, he had some time to himself… and had chosen to spend it cooking.

True, his result wasn't the culinary masterpiece that Tayce T. could have made, but it was… pasta. Koopasta, to be exact.

Mario sat down and twirled a clump of noodles onto his fork, bringing it towards his hungry mouth…

"Mario! Bowser's at it again!"

Said plumber glanced up at a frantic Luigi, who had burst through the door.

Oh well. Time to go.

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**Author's Note**: Inspired by a tasty dinner at an Italian restaurant. All you Paper Mario fans recognize the dish, right? ;)


	4. Switch

"_What?_"

"P-Princess, I'm afraid Bowser has ambushed and kidnapped Mario," repeated Toadsworth, his mustached face pale.

"Mario?" spluttered Peach. "Kidnapped? By Bowser? How is that even…?"

"I… suppose he's changed his tactics." With a shaking hand, Toadsworth pulled a battered slip of paper from his vest pocket. "Bowser left this on the steps; it's how I found out."

The princess took the note in one gloved hand, blue eyes narrowing as she read the untidy scrawl.

"Toadsworth?" she said eventually, her fist crumpling the note. "I'm going to need my purse- the one with the Fire Flowers. And my parasol."


	5. Exceptional

"I'm totally screwed," muttered Goombella, staring at the flickering screen. Twelve pages of text stared back at her—so far, a decent research paper, considering she'd had three months to write it and had started a mere week ago. The problem?

It needed to be at least twenty pages long by tomorrow morning.

The U-goom undergraduate glumly toddled off to buy a cup of coffee. It would be a long night…

"You've finished your paper already?" exclaimed Professor Frankly the next morning. "You, my dear, are exceptional!"

"But wasn't it due today?" inquired Goombella, confused.

"No... I said _next _Tuesday."


	6. And We Have A Winner!

"Mario and Luigi are neck-to-neck, approaching the finish line!" blared the announcer. "This is gonna be a close one, folks!"

Said brothers slammed their feet on the gas, gloved hands clutching their steering wheels.

_Sorry, little bro, but I'm a-gonna win today, _thought Mario, pressing the gas pedal a bit harder. He pulled an inch ahead of Luigi—five feet to go—

"And we have a winner!" the announcer bellowed as a green blur crossed the finish line, flames shooting out the back. "With a stunning last-minute Mushroom, Yoshi rocketed from fourth to first!"

…_I've been beaten by a dino._

_

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**Author's Note: **Whee, Mario Kart! 8D I almost always play as Yoshi. ^^


	7. Score

Peach, Daisy, and Bowser Junior stared, dumbfounded, at the bundle stirring before them. A claw peeked out here; a tail poked out there; several spikes poked through the net holes; and a massive snout stuck out opposite the tail. Several yards away, a volleyball bounced once more before rolling to a stop, but the players hardly noticed it.

"Bowser and Bowser Junior win the game!" roared the announcer. "Bowser's spike scored the winning point—but it looks like he overdid the jump a bit, folks!"

Despite the annoyed grunt following that comment, Junior could have sworn his dad was grinning.

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**Author's Note: **Special thanks goes to dragon19kyoshi, who recommended a chapter based on Mario Sports Mix. I've never actually played it, but I looked it up online-it looks fun! =D


	8. Rules

Mario stared, fascinated. Puddles of honey spotted the ground, apparently formed by the golden drops that fell from the forest canopy, and two beehives hung on either edge of the clearing. That wasn't what he was staring at, though. As far as strange scenery went, he'd seen it all: smiling clouds, giant beanstalks… No, this was simply another setting for a party game.

What fascinated him was how, instead of ducking when the bees came out, Yoshi had started eating them.

"Yoshi?" said Mario eventually, when the dinosaur's tongue had nabbed the last bee, "I-a think that's against-a the rules."

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**Author's Note: **Another request from dragon19kyoshi-again I figured, why not? This is based on a mini-game from Mario Party (I forget which one.. 5, 6, 7, 8, 9? ^^;) by the way.


	9. Revenge

"Noooo!" screeched the Shadow Queen as the four creatures before her held the Crystal Stars—_her _Crystal Stars—aloft. She could feel the glittering stones' magic, the power she had once wielded and by right should still wield, binding her, forcing her toward the stifling, imprisoning darkness.. The darkness that she had once controlled…

These pitiful beings had robbed her of everything—her world, her power, and now her freedom. She could feel her spirit weakening, fading into insubstantiality, and her mind growing fuzzy…

One last word rang cold, clear in her thoughts as she cast her final spell.

_Revenge._

_

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_**Author's Notes: **Well whaddaya know, I wrote something dark. O_O Huh... Don't worry, the next snapshot will probably be light and humorous. By the way, all you Thousand-Year-Door fans who've listened to Grifty know what moment I'm talking about here, right? No, not when Mario finally vanquished her. Think black treasure chests. ;)

... You think this series of one-shots is still okay rated K, or should I change it to K+ now?


	10. Hands

"Yo, Goombella, Bobbery, I've always wondered—how d'you guys hold stuff when you don't have hands?"

The U-Goom graduate and the explosive old sea salt looked up in surprise, glancing at their friends—Koops, one elbow on Podley's bar, Flurrie, Tasty Tonic in hand, Vivian, eyes hidden beneath her hat, Ms. Mowz, perched daintily on her stool, and Yoshi, the spunky little dino who had asked the question—before staring back down at their Chuckola Colas as if the sugar-loaded soda held the answer.

"Y'know, I have no idea," confessed Goombella eventually, frowning.

"Nor do I, old boy," remarked Bobbery.

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**Author's Note: **A little spoof on something I've always wondered. Gotta love Mario game logic... Anyway, reviews are more than welcome! ;D


	11. The Odds

The Koopa King grinned wickedly as he surveyed his most dastardly creation yet. Before him burned a massive ball of fire, flares erupting on its surface as it floated, like some odd, isolated bobble, in the blackness. And to think—all he had needed was some—well, more like a hundred or so—Power Stars to execute this _awesome _plan.

"Mario will stop you!" raged a familiar, pink-clad blonde from within his meaty fist. "He _always_ beats you!"

Bowser actually chuckled at this. After all...

"C'mon, Princess. What're the odds he'd get to me in _deep_ _space_, of all places?"

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**Author's Note: **But we know what happens, don't we~ Mario beats him anyways. Again. XD

*dodges tomatoes from not updating in forever* This is based on Super Mario Galaxy. AWESOME game, though I love the sequel even more! 8)


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